WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?
Oh, wow my last blogpost was in April 2016. It was a
video that I did in the conference room of my old office space. It was a day
without makeup, but a lot of thoughts. I was consumed with how great people functioned
in the midst of being very afraid and was inspired to do a video. My life has
changed so drastically since 2016. Little did I know April 2016 was the last
month of my life being settled and mundane. My greatest worries were college
tuition for my son and ensuring my company had funds monthly to remain self-sustaining.
May 2016 ushered in a tsunami of challenges that still seem to overtake me. I
have been walking with wobbly water legs since. Some days I just feel I cannot
go on. There are no real respites. I just stop and decide to be grateful,
smile, laugh, and encourage others at sporadic intervals throughout a given day.
I always make a point of telling others that as I encourage you, I encourage myself.
The people that receive services through the
non-profit I have been blessed to steward are my sheroes, heroes and props.
They make me laugh and their desire to change their lives gives me strength to
catch my breath to be there for them. We truly are helping each other. In the
swirl of politics, a pandemic, and mounting societal issues everyone has been
living with water legs. So, I was well equipped for the challenges placed upon
the world in 2020. Thankfully, today I feel more hopeful than I have been in
the past four years. There is no specific event and there is no financial
windfall it is just an inner knowing from Holy Spirit that “the storm is
The subject Where Have You Been? connotes a sense of missing
in action or lost. However, it is in the sense of being lost that I have come
to realize that I was actually collecting unfinished fragments of myself that
allowed me to truly relate to people that live with insurmountable challenges. I
accepted the assignment to help people experience a life of accepting the
person God created them to be. Not realizing that to be fully engaged in the assignment
required what felt like a total collapse of my life as I knew it. I said to a
few people I do not even recognize my life. Where did it go? What happened to
Today I know that nothing happened to me or my life. I
needed to grow and things that seemed like challenges were designed to
strengthen my spirit to be of greater service. Nothing has been withheld or
held back. I believe that God is a master mixologist with capacity to take hard
chunky pieces and make them like silk. The blending process is loud, resistant,
and sometimes parts of us gets stuck on the walls of life in the process. Then
God comes and moves the stuck pieces back into the blended parts. The outcome
is delicious, tasteful, and aesthetically appealing. Additionally, the completed blend does not display evidence or
proof that at one time the ingredients were detached and foreign to
Therefore, the question is not Where Have You Been? but
Where Are You Going?